Video calls have become a normal part of work, education, and socializing. However, one of the strangest aspects of video conferencing is watching yourself on the screen. Whether it’s Zoom, Microsoft Teams, or Google Meet, most platforms show a small window of your own face.
For many, this experience is unsettling. Why do we feel self-conscious, distracted, or even exhausted when looking at ourselves on Zoom? This topic explores the psychology behind it, how it affects our self-perception, and what we can do to feel more comfortable.
Why Watching Yourself on Zoom Feels Strange
1. Seeing Yourself Constantly Is Unnatural
In real life, we rarely see ourselves. Aside from glancing in a mirror or looking at photos, our focus is usually on other people. On Zoom, however, we see ourselves continuously-sometimes for hours. This isn’t how human interaction is meant to work, which can feel jarring.
2. It Triggers Self-Criticism
When we watch ourselves on video, we become hyper-aware of our expressions, posture, and appearance. Many people notice small imperfections they wouldn’t normally think about, like the way they smile, how their hair looks, or how they fidget. This can lead to self-consciousness, distraction, and even a drop in confidence.
3. The ‘Mirror Effect’ Feels Off
Most video platforms display a mirrored version of ourselves, which is what we’re used to seeing in the mirror. However, this isn’t how others see us. When the camera flips the image back to reality (or when we see recordings of ourselves), it can feel odd or unnatural because we’re not used to it.
4. Delayed Facial Feedback Confuses the Brain
When speaking in person, we don’t see our own facial expressions in real time. On Zoom, there is a slight delay in video transmission, meaning our brains process our own movements with a fraction of a second lag. This can make our expressions feel disconnected from our words, leading to a strange sense of dissonance.
The Psychological Effects of Seeing Yourself on Zoom
1. Zoom Fatigue Is Real
Spending hours on video calls is exhausting, but watching ourselves makes it even worse. Constantly monitoring our appearance takes up mental energy that could be used for listening and engaging in the conversation. This contributes to what experts call Zoom fatigue-feeling mentally drained after video meetings.
2. Increased Anxiety and Self-Consciousness
Studies suggest that people who focus too much on their own image in video calls experience higher levels of stress and anxiety. Instead of paying attention to the discussion, they worry about how they look, leading to increased nervousness and less effective communication.
3. Altered Self-Perception
Repeatedly seeing ourselves on screen can change the way we view our own appearance. Some people may become overly critical, noticing ‘flaws’ they never cared about before. Others might start adjusting their facial expressions or posture unnaturally, which can feel exhausting over time.
How to Feel More Comfortable on Zoom
1. Hide Your Self-View
Most video platforms allow users to turn off their self-view while keeping their camera on for others. This removes the distraction of constantly seeing yourself, allowing you to focus on the conversation instead of your own face.
2. Adjust Camera Positioning
A poorly positioned camera can make you look awkward or distorted. Place your camera at eye level and ensure good lighting to create a more natural look. This helps reduce the tendency to stare at yourself or worry about angles.
3. Use Speaker View Instead of Gallery View
In Zoom and similar platforms, switching to speaker view minimizes the number of faces on the screen, including your own. This allows you to focus more on the speaker, mimicking a real-life conversation.
4. Take Breaks from Video Calls
If possible, avoid back-to-back video meetings. Consider turning off your camera occasionally or opting for audio-only calls when visual presence isn’t necessary. Reducing screen time can help prevent Zoom fatigue and self-perception stress.
5. Focus on the Conversation, Not Your Appearance
Remind yourself that the purpose of a video call is communication, not perfection. Most people are paying attention to what you say, not analyzing your every movement. Shifting your focus to the discussion rather than your image can make video calls feel more natural.
The Science Behind Self-Perception on Zoom
1. The ‘Spotlight Effect’
Psychologists call this the ‘spotlight effect’-the tendency to believe others are noticing us more than they actually are. On Zoom, it feels like everyone is watching us closely, but in reality, most people are too focused on themselves or the conversation.
2. The Impact of Social Comparison
Seeing ourselves next to others in a Zoom grid can lead to unconscious comparisons. We might compare our expressions, backgrounds, or even how engaged we look. This can make some people feel less confident or self-aware, even when there’s no real reason for it.
3. Mirror Anxiety and Self-Objectification
Research suggests that staring at our own reflection for long periods can increase anxiety. It can make us overanalyze small details of our face or mannerisms, a phenomenon known as self-objectification. This is when people start seeing themselves as an object to be observed rather than a person engaging in a conversation.
The Future of Video Calls and Self-Perception
As remote work and virtual meetings continue, platforms may start addressing the discomfort of self-view. Some companies are experimenting with:
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AI tools that subtly adjust facial expressions to look more natural
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Augmented reality (AR) filters that smooth lighting and reduce distractions
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More customizable self-view settings to help users feel less self-conscious
Future updates may help video calls feel more natural and less exhausting for everyone.
Watching yourself on Zoom feels weird because it’s not how human interactions are meant to work. Seeing ourselves in real-time creates self-consciousness, distraction, and even stress. However, by adjusting settings, focusing on conversations, and taking breaks, we can make video calls feel more natural.
As virtual meetings remain part of daily life, understanding how self-view affects our psychology can help us navigate Zoom calls with more confidence and ease.