Humiliation is one of the most harmful forms of emotional harm. Some individuals take pleasure in making others feel embarrassed, small, or unworthy. Whether it happens in workplaces, social settings, or online, public humiliation can have lasting negative effects on a person’s confidence and mental well-being.
Why do some people enjoy humiliating others? What drives their behavior, and how can you effectively handle them? This topic explores the psychological reasons behind this toxic habit, its impact, and ways to protect yourself from those who seek to bring others down.
What Does It Mean to Humiliate Someone?
Humiliation is the act of intentionally making someone feel ashamed, embarrassed, or inferior. People who humiliate others use harsh words, public criticism, or degrading actions to lower another person’s self-esteem.
Some common ways people humiliate others include:
- Publicly criticizing or mocking someone
- Bringing up past mistakes to embarrass someone
- Using sarcasm and condescending language
- Exposing personal or private details to shame someone
- Forcing someone into uncomfortable situations for amusement
Humiliation can happen in personal relationships, professional environments, and even online through cyberbullying and public shaming.
Why Do People Humiliate Others?
There are several psychological and social reasons why some individuals feel the need to humiliate others.
1. Insecurity and Low Self-Esteem
Many people who humiliate others do so because they are deeply insecure. They try to mask their own feelings of inadequacy by bringing others down.
- They believe that making others feel weak will make them appear strong.
- They project their own self-doubts onto others.
- They feel better about themselves when they diminish someone else’s confidence.
2. Desire for Power and Control
Humiliating others is often a way for someone to assert dominance and control. This is commonly seen in toxic workplaces, bullying situations, and abusive relationships.
- They want to establish authority over others.
- They use humiliation to manipulate and intimidate.
- They believe making others feel small gives them more influence.
3. Narcissistic Personality Traits
People with narcissistic tendencies often use humiliation as a tool to maintain their sense of superiority. They lack empathy and believe they are better than others.
- They feel entitled to criticize and mock people.
- They dismiss other people’s emotions and concerns.
- They seek admiration and dominance, even at the expense of others.
4. Jealousy and Envy
Some people humiliate others out of jealousy. They feel threatened by someone’s success, confidence, or abilities, so they try to undermine them.
- They fear losing attention or recognition.
- They try to damage the reputation of those they envy.
- They hope that by shaming someone, they can reduce their influence.
5. Learned Behavior from Upbringing or Environment
Some individuals grow up in environments where humiliation is normalized. They may have experienced it themselves and now repeat the cycle.
- They were raised by overly critical or abusive caregivers.
- They have worked or lived in toxic environments where humiliation is common.
- They believe that degrading others is a way to gain respect or authority.
6. Lack of Emotional Intelligence
Some people humiliate others because they lack emotional awareness and do not understand the impact of their words or actions.
- They don’t recognize how their behavior affects others.
- They fail to see the long-term damage they cause.
- They use humor or “jokes” as an excuse for cruelty.
The Impact of Humiliation on Others
Being humiliated can cause deep emotional and psychological harm. The effects can be long-lasting and affect various aspects of life.
1. Damage to Self-Esteem
Public humiliation can crush a person’s confidence, leading to:
- Self-doubt and feelings of inadequacy.
- Fear of speaking up or sharing opinions.
- Anxiety about social interactions.
2. Increased Stress and Anxiety
Constant exposure to humiliation can create stress and emotional distress, resulting in:
- Fear of being in public or social situations.
- Overthinking and second-guessing every action.
- Emotional exhaustion from trying to avoid criticism.
3. Social Withdrawal and Isolation
Many victims of humiliation withdraw from social settings to avoid further embarrassment. This can lead to:
- Loss of friendships and social connections.
- Avoidance of professional or educational opportunities.
- Increased feelings of loneliness and depression.
4. Long-Term Psychological Effects
Severe and repeated humiliation can cause lasting emotional scars, including:
- Low self-worth and self-hatred.
- Fear of failure or rejection.
- In extreme cases, depression and suicidal thoughts.
How to Deal with People Who Humiliate Others
Handling someone who constantly humiliates others requires confidence, awareness, and setting boundaries.
1. Stay Calm and Confident
One of the best ways to deal with humiliation is to remain calm and not let their words affect you.
- Maintain eye contact and show that you are unaffected.
- Respond in a composed and confident manner.
- Avoid showing signs of embarrassment, which they may seek.
2. Set Boundaries
Let the person know their behavior is unacceptable and that you will not tolerate it.
- Firmly say, “I don’t appreciate being spoken to like that.”
- Walk away if the person continues their behavior.
- Establish clear limits on how you allow people to treat you.
3. Call Them Out on Their Behavior
Many people humiliate others because they believe no one will challenge them. Confronting them can be effective.
- Ask them directly, “Why do you feel the need to embarrass me?”
- Let them know how their actions are affecting you.
- Speak up if their behavior is inappropriate in a group setting.
4. Surround Yourself with Supportive People
Avoid spending time with those who constantly put you down. Instead, seek out people who uplift and support you.
- Build a strong circle of positive influences.
- Avoid toxic individuals who thrive on negativity.
- Develop self-confidence through healthy relationships.
5. Don’t Take It Personally
Humiliation says more about the person doing it than the person experiencing it.
- Remind yourself that their words don’t define you.
- Recognize that their need to humiliate stems from their own issues.
- Focus on your strengths and ignore their negativity.
6. Report or Escalate When Necessary
If the humiliation occurs in a workplace, school, or public setting, consider reporting it.
- Speak to a supervisor, HR representative, or teacher.
- Document incidents if the behavior is repeated.
- Seek support from authorities if the situation becomes abusive.
When Humiliation Becomes Emotional Abuse
In some cases, humiliation is more than just an occasional bad habit—it can be a form of emotional abuse. If someone constantly humiliates you, isolates you, and makes you feel worthless, it may be time to:
- Reevaluate the relationship and distance yourself.
- Seek support from trusted friends, family, or professionals.
- Recognize that no one deserves to be treated with disrespect.
People who like to humiliate others often do so because of insecurity, a need for control, or a lack of emotional intelligence. Their words and actions can deeply affect their victims, causing long-term damage to confidence and mental health. However, by recognizing their behavior, setting boundaries, and maintaining self-confidence, you can protect yourself from their toxic influence.
Respect and kindness should always be the foundation of human interactions. The best way to rise above those who humiliate others is to refuse to be affected by their negativity and to surround yourself with people who uplift and encourage you.